Pre-op assessment

I had my pre-op assessment this afternoon. Which was interesting.

Firstly I've shrunk! I always reckoned I was 6ft tall but I'm a bit shorter. It's an age thing apparently. Fortunately my weight didn't go up compared to our bathroom scales so they are reasonably accurate (a Kilogramme or so difference which can be accounted for by clothing).

Then it was on to the ECG, I've never had one of these before and the nurse tried to avoid putting the sticky contacts on too much body hair (:-)) She must have succeeded as they didn't hurt when she removed them. Once all the leads were attached and some advice "Just relax and breathe steadily", she set it going and it promptly had a fit going "wee-wah! wee-wah!" in high pitched electronic fashion. A few more button presses: "Your heart rate is too low - it thinks you've died!" "OK, relax again" Relax?! It thinks I'm dead! This time all went well - presumably the excitement had pushed my heart rate up enough for the machine to recognise I wasn't a corpse.

Then it was a long question and answer session about lifestyle, previous medical history of both myself and of close family. Twenty sheets of questions.

Finally it ended with that awkward question in the other direction: "Do you have any questions?". Well yes, it's just that having been bombarded with information, plied with pamphlets, info sheets, more questionnaires I don't know where to start. So some heavy reading material for this evening before tomorrow's Joint Replacement Education Group.

In two weeks' time it will be done. The countdown begins.